Okay,
I passed SIP.
Merely,
PASS.
Seriously,
what's the point?
I hate studies.
I hate school.
I hate lecturers.
I HATE FUCKING PEOPLE WHO GRADE US.
I shall not put in anymore effort into studies.
I will cruise my way through uni because I HAVE to get a degree.
I will fuck care GPA.
New life resolution.
PARTY HARD, WORK LESS.
_________________________________________________________
I watched Crazy Hearts.
So reminded me of dad.
Sometimes I'm scared.
Really very scared.
I mean,
Dad's not young.
If something happened to him,
my last words to him would be the most unkind ones.
Yet,
I can't bring myself to forgive him.
How can I forgive and forget?
He deserves it.
Every bit of it.
Dad used to be my superman.
Despite everything,
I loved him.
I enjoy walking down the road with him,
fingers crossed.
Now, I barely want to see him.
When I speak to him,
I just want to scold out loud.
I cross my arms.
I don't even want to look at him sometimes.
How did things turn out this way?
Money is the root of all evil.
It really is.
Still,
without it,
nothing works.
I learnt it the hard way.
As for mom,
I can't speak to her properly as well.
She pisses me off so easily.
God I don't know why.
I don't even look forward to her calls anymore.
I'm so tired.
She'll never understand.
No matter how many times I explain,
she never gets it.
________________________________________________________
No one understands.
Everyone thought they know a lot,
but actually no one does.
FYI, my life is not as perfect as it seem to be.
I got my first consultation at Subordinate Courts tomorrow.
I have to settle my uni stuff, which I'm doing it on my own.
I have to wait 1 more week to check on something.
I have to fulfill my 10 years to my first million promise I throwed at Dad.
Thank you very much god.
I don't believe you exist.
Not really.
If you do,
the first thing you should do is to make people like Dad to do what they say.
I nearly spit at him when he talk to me about FAIRNESS.
FUCK YOU BIG TIME MAN.
I can't believe I scolded the F word to Mom that day.
Maybe she gets it this time?
Like finally?
No one knows about the court case.
I'm not sharing with Mom or Dad.
Why?
Because I got a feeling they'll say,
"SEE! That's what you get for not listening to your cousin. Always think you're very smart. Never check properly. YADA YADA YADA."
FYI parents,
If I know I would have step on him with stilettos.
Parents SUCK BIG TIME!
Okay,
I can't wait to get it over and done with, with uni and get on with my life man.
___________________________________________________________
Just want to rant.
Don't ask me anything.
Don't fell like talking about this anymore.
I'll be fine the next morning.
